Welcome to Mondo Samu - Questions and Answers about my self-work.

Mondō: "questions and answers"; a recorded collection of dialogues between a pupil and teacher.
Samu: Work service; meditation in work.


Tuesday, February 15, 2011

I'm Positive That Negativity Sucks!

Man, I had a great weekend!  It sped by, as they tend to do, but it was great.  There wasn't anything special about it.  No big exciting fun.  Just lots and lots of little moments that were great.  Friday night, I had an excellent walk.  Saturday morning I spent time with a friend and my daughter, then more time with another friend and both our kids.  Had a nice lazy day around the house the middle part of Saturday.  Home alone for a few hours to read and relax.  Nice evening.  Sunday I hung out with my brother for a few hours, then more home alone time.  Sunday evening I took a great walk in the park at dusk.  The whole thing was just nice.  Here's a pic from the park.

Now, by this time you might be wondering what the title of this post has to do with the great weekend I had.  Well, here it is.

Friday night, I also had a lengthy phone conversation with a friend who was being extremely negative and complaining about everything, and they actually irritated me which is rare.  Saturday, another friend made a couple of sideways stabs at me online with some holier than thou attitude and crap.  I had a few minor disagreements with a couple of family members.  One of my favorite authors posted some blog stuff that was real negative.  As I said, he's a favorite of mine, and he's a cool guy, but his books and posts can sometimes come across as really negative.  And a bunch of other little minor annoying stuff happened that was a drag as well.

But come Monday morning, when I got to work and people asked me how my weekend was, I told everyone how GREAT my weekend was, and none of those crappy things came to mind at all.  This is generally how I live life.  I'm USUALLY a happy person with low stress.  I simply don't care about, or am not bothered by, most of lifes little annoying bitches and moans.  I'm not perfect, and I do my own share of negative business, but the majority of the time, my outlook is pretty happy and positive.

I was reading some stuff about Buddhism and negativity, and found a great quote by the Dalai Lama saying "...is an action influenced by anger not very likely to cause more negativity?"

That makes a lot of sense, right?  I mean, if I let all those little things get to me, and lashed out (more angrily than the polite lashing out that I did) at my friend who was being so negative, or if I pointed out to my "holier than thou" friend that his negative attack was worse for his Karma than the thing he perceives me to be guilty of, or if I just hauled off and pimp-slapped some of the people who pissed me off...no good would come of it.

Instead, I am happy to say that - with the exception of being slightly annoyed or perhaps even tickled by these things - most of this stuff doesn't even come up on my radar.  The more annoying things do, but even they are quickly forgotten.  As always, it is mindfulness that helps me with this.  Having a mindful hang-out with my brother or friends, some mindful walking in the park or my favorite of all - mindful breakfast with my daughter, just makes those negative things so unimportant that I mostly forget about them.  It's a great thing.

So, why write about them?  Am I being negative by just talking about these things at all?  Probably.  But I decided to write this post in the hopes that someone, ANYone, out there might read this and take a pause to think about whether they are sniping at their friends, or snapping at their loved ones or just taking pot shots at their acquaintances.  We all do it at some point or another.  And if they find that they are, maybe take a minute to reflect on why we feel we need to do this, then take a few more moments to be mindful.

Not only will this mindfulness possibly prevent them from being hateful or hurtful to others, but more than likely it will probably make them happier in their own lives which is probably the source of the trouble to start with.

Just a few thoughts for you on this fine Monday Tuesday (I didn't have time to post this yesterday)!  Have a good one!

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